Who Am I to Talk About Rest?
I am a busy person. Now, I know “busy” has gotten a bad name these days as a relic of hustle culture, but I am - in all forms of the word - busy. As a multi-passionate person who is highly motivated, busy is the natural conclusion. My iCal is booked up, to-do lists overflowing, and people routinely ask me when I have time to sleep.
I want to be clear, I'm using busy as a neutral adjective. There is nothing inherently better, more noble, or more aspirational about being busy. I have peers who like to take things slow, focus on one thing at a time, or lounge around with no plan for the coming day (or coming week, or even the coming month), and that's a-okay! There are times when I wish I had their disposition, when I wish that free-time didn't make me antsy. But it does, so I stay busy.
There is one thing that both someone who is busy and someone who isn’t need, and that thing is rest.
The busy people that I have come across who don’t leave room for rest often embody the type of busyness that the internet has turned its back on in recent months. These people are not only busy but they are:
Overextended
Losing sleep
Unable to maintain a healthy work/life balance
Double-booked
Dropping the ball on commitments (or forgetting about them completely)
Putting all of their self worth into their output
And that kind of busy is destructive. As a recent graduate who wore busy as a badge of honour, and adhered to external definitions of busy instead of figuring out what that meant to me, I became destructively occupied. Throughout my time at university I:
Finished my undergraduate degree in 4 years (Students are increasingly taking 5+ years to complete a bachelor’s degree at a 4-year degree-granting institution)
Never had a summer off (always took a full course-load each summer and worked multiple jobs)
Worked at least 3 jobs each Fall and Winter semester, and at least 2 jobs each summer session (while studying as a full-time student)
Was a varsity athlete
Participated in clubs, student government, and various speaking events/conferences
Was always tweaking and adding to personal passion projects
As a student I was very busy, and I was enjoying it, but I was woefully overextended. It wasn’t until the summer prior to my final year that I realized the cycle I was in wasn’t sustainable. That I was beyond burnt out, that my health was suffering for it, and that I needed a change.
The problem? I didn’t want to let anything go. I truly loved the majority of the things that I invested my time into. This love of mine resulted in me putting too much pressure on extended time off, holidays, or the end of a commitment as illusive times for rest.
The problem with that? A holiday would arrive, or a commitment would end, and my fabled time off would be…booked!?
I am boundaries-secure (a blog post on that coming soon!) and I’m comfortable with saying no, but my varied interests still had me saying yes to So. Many. Things!
Then, a lightbulb went off, and I realized that I needed to book in time for rest the same way that I committed to my passions. It was from there that the rest planning ritual was born, since booking requires planning.
Now I’m a graduate with two jobs, a micro-business, plus many passions and hobbies, but I juggle the busyness without loosing sleep by planning for rest in advance (and staying committed to my iCal!)
Are you also:
Falling apart, overextended, and wishing you could put a pause on everything for a while
Tired all of the time from an inability to slow down, sleep, or relax your nervous system
Double-booking your calendar or forgetting about commitments entirely
Are you:
A busy person who is always on to their next thing
Someone who hustles and is highly motivated
Someone who says “I’ll sleep when I’m dead”
Someone who pushes themselves to keep giving 100% at everything because “things will calm down next week” (but “calm” never comes)
Would you rather:
Having pre-scheduled specific break points and activities throughout your calendar, shielding you from becoming consumed in the commitments that are negatively impacting your wellbeing
The peace-of-mind in knowing that the world around you won’t fall apart if you frequently take time for yourself
Knowing exactly what activities you need to pivot to in times of overwhelm, and which community supports to turn to, without having to spend any energy coming up with these resources in those moments of stress or chaos
The guidance of a personalized guide for how you are going to take time for yourself throughout the process, keeping you away from burning out and dropping the ball
If you’re ready to step into prioritizing your rest and wellbeing, without having to sacrifice all of your commitments and passions, then I invite you to attend the Intentional Rest Planning Ritual.